I don’t really make New Year’s resolutions, and I don’t consider this to be that. I don’t feel like I need it make a list of things to do, because I tend to overthink everything anyway.
However, I just want to write everything down and reflect on my year later. My biggest goal this year is to work on my mental health and, for some reason, I think this could be a good starting point.
Visit the doctor, start taking meds.
I found a doctor, now I just need to make an appointment. I have no idea what effect the meds could have, but I think I’m finally ready and in need of a change.
Start working out.
Not necessarily at the gym, but at least, start running every evening for 20 minutes, or actually use the pilates ball that I bought. My back and my joints are in terrible shape, and I feel something bad is coming if I don’t start moving around. Also, I lose my breath extremely quickly.
I’ve been living at home almost two years now. It felt so different when I was away at college. Now I’m just stuck in my room because I have no friends here, and stuck cooking for my family (when mom’s at work), and I hate it, I think I’ve never hated anything as much as I hate cooking.
Get my Master’s Degree.
I have one exam left, but it’s a paper that I have to write and I honestly don’t know where to start. And then I “just” have to do my Master’s thesis.
Ok, this is something that’s definitely gonna happen, ’cause I already paid a third of the trip. We’re going to visit Scandinavia, and I’m excited and terrified at the same time.
Be less nervous and overthink less.
This is probably the hardest thing I’ll have to do. But I’m hoping the meds will have at least some effect on this. I’ve been very scared of travelling lately and I hate it. I want to experience and see new things, but at the same time, my brain’s not letting me.
I keep thinking there was another thing I wanted to add to this, but I just can’t remember (I might add it later).
There are some things that I’m super scared of and probably won’t do, like driving a car (even though I have a licence). But for some reason, I think that I’ll have a different approach to life in general after I start taking meds. And I feel like this is a huge misconception and I really, really don’t know what to expect. But I guess I’ll find out once I make the appointment.
I really hate putting things out there, I feel like as soon as I say something, the world’s gonna try to spite me. I barely told anyone about Scandinavia, ’cause I don’t want to jinx it. And I wrote this really quickly, ’cause I haven’t been here in forever, and I didn’t want to forget to do it again.